Stop Waiting for the Perfect Time

For a long time, I had all these ideas about what I wanted to do, and I was really good at thinking about them. I could plan them, research them, talk myself into them, and somehow talk myself right back out of them. I kept thinking I needed to know a little more, have a better plan, feel more confident, or just wait until life wasn't quite so busy. There was always something that made “later” feel like the smarter choice. But if I'm being completely truthful, a lot of that planning was really fear dressed up as preparation. I wasn't waiting for the right time. I was waiting to feel completely ready, and that moment never came.

That list never got shorter. It just got longer and quieter and more convincing, until years had passed and I was still standing in the exact same spot, just older and a little more tired of my own excuses.

Maybe you know that spot. There's something you've been sensing for a while now: a conversation you keep avoiding, a business you keep meaning to start, a degree you keep putting off, a relationship that needs an honest word, a dream that feels almost embarrassing to say out loud because you've carried it silently for so long. And every time it surfaces, you push it back down with something that sounds reasonable. Not yet. Not like this. Not until I'm ready.

Here's what I've had to admit about myself, though: I was never going to feel ready. Ready isn't a feeling that shows up on its own. It's something you build by moving, not something you wait for so you can move.

I think we tell ourselves that once fear goes away, we'll finally be brave enough. But fear doesn't usually leave first and let courage walk in behind it. More often they show up together, in the same body, at the same time, and you have to decide which one gets to drive. Courage was never the absence of my shaking hands or my racing thoughts. Courage was doing the thing anyway, while my hands were still shaking.

I remember the first time I said yes to something I felt completely unqualified for. I had every reason to say no. I didn't have the experience, I didn't have it figured out, and I was terrified of doing it badly in front of people who would notice. I sat with that fear for a long time, waiting for it to resolve into confidence. It never did. What happened instead was smaller and less dramatic: I took the next step while still afraid. I showed up to the room not knowing what I'd say. I didn't become brave first and then act brave. I acted, afraid, and something shifted in me only after.

I've come to believe that God has never been in the business of waiting for us to get impressive first. Every time I look back at the moments that shaped my faith, the common thread isn't confidence. It's ordinary people who felt unsure, unqualified, and afraid, who took a step anyway because something in them trusted there was a bigger hand holding the outcome. Not one of them had a finished plan. Not one of them felt ready. And yet that's exactly who got used, still afraid, still unsure, still full of questions, simply willing to move.

That's been the most freeing thing for me to understand: I don't have to become a different, more polished version of myself before I'm allowed to begin. I don't have to wait until I've healed from everything, learned everything, or outgrown every insecurity. I just have to be willing to move with what I have right now, trusting that faith can carry what my own confidence can't. Faith over fear doesn't mean the fear disappears. It means I stop letting it have the final word.

I also want to say this gently, because I believed the opposite for most of my life: waiting for certainty isn't the safe choice it feels like. It feels responsible, even. But sitting still isn't neutral. It's still a decision, and it has a cost. Every year I waited to feel ready was a year I didn't grow, didn't learn, didn't find out what I was capable of. The step doesn't have to be big. It just has to be real, and it has to be today instead of someday.

So here's what I'd love for you to do, if something in you is already whispering, I know exactly what this is talking about for me. Think of the one thing. Not the whole vision, just the thing you've been circling around and putting off. Maybe it's an application you've been meaning to submit. Maybe it's a phone call you've rehearsed a hundred times but never made. Maybe it's simply telling one trusted person, "I think I'm supposed to do this, and I'm scared." Pick something small enough to do today, and then do it today. Not when you feel ready. Not when the fear quiets down. Today, as you are.

You don't need the whole staircase visible before you're allowed to climb it. You just need to be willing to take the next step, the one right in front of you, the one you can actually see from here. That's the whole assignment. Not a flawless plan, not a fear-free heart, not a finished version of yourself. Just a willingness to move, one honest step at a time, trusting that the rest of the staircase will show up as you need it.

Helping women and teens rediscover their worth.

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